Fuck you. Why can't you be like our other roommate? Your laptop is ALWAYS on and it's ALWAYS playing a sports cast of some sort. And if your laptop is on, so it your tv, which is on ESPN. Do you REALLY need to watch two different sports casts at the same time? Even when your tv is off you still listen to your sportscast on your laptop. Sure, that's not so bad. But why the fuck did you spend $150 on headphones just to never fucking use them? I don't have a problem with you watching tv at 11 at night. I'm still up. I don't even have a problem with you watching it at midnight, because I'm usually still up. But when it's 2 in the fucking morning, it is COMPLETELY unacceptable to turn that fucking thing on when it's clear that your other roommates are trying to sleep. We're both in bed. We're not on our computers.
HAVE SOME FUCKING RESPECT AND SHUT THAT SHIT OFF. It's not even the fact that it's on is so bad. It's that you listen to it as if you lost your fucking hearing aid.
Then there's your showers. I understand that a man has needs. I understand that when you're fat and ugly and you live in the barracks the only way of satisfying those needs is to relieve yourself in the shower. But do you have to do it every single time you take a shower? I don't even know if that's what you do when your in there, but what the fuck else could you POSSIBLY be doing during your 30+ minute showers. Yes, I timed you, because it happens every day. You DO realize that you have two other roommates that like to stay hydrated, right? We don't want to have to wait for 15 minutes to piss because you take longer showers than should be allowed by law.
Oh, and pick up your damn feet. We don't want to hear you drag them in your shower shoes making all that damn noise.
Sincerely,
Your pissed off roommate.
P.S. I'm going to give you about five more minutes to shut that fucking thing off before I throw it out the window. It's 2:45 in the morning.
[Edit]
It was three in the morning and I asked him "You going to bed soon?" to which he replied "nope" WTF!?
Oh, and let it be known that even with the sound down, the light from the tv is still flooding the room. Keep in mind that I live in the barracks, so it's three guys in a 12x12 room.
HAVE SOME FUCKING RESPECT AND SHUT THAT SHIT OFF. It's not even the fact that it's on is so bad. It's that you listen to it as if you lost your fucking hearing aid.
Then there's your showers. I understand that a man has needs. I understand that when you're fat and ugly and you live in the barracks the only way of satisfying those needs is to relieve yourself in the shower. But do you have to do it every single time you take a shower? I don't even know if that's what you do when your in there, but what the fuck else could you POSSIBLY be doing during your 30+ minute showers. Yes, I timed you, because it happens every day. You DO realize that you have two other roommates that like to stay hydrated, right? We don't want to have to wait for 15 minutes to piss because you take longer showers than should be allowed by law.
Oh, and pick up your damn feet. We don't want to hear you drag them in your shower shoes making all that damn noise.
Sincerely,
Your pissed off roommate.
P.S. I'm going to give you about five more minutes to shut that fucking thing off before I throw it out the window. It's 2:45 in the morning.
[Edit]
It was three in the morning and I asked him "You going to bed soon?" to which he replied "nope" WTF!?
Oh, and let it be known that even with the sound down, the light from the tv is still flooding the room. Keep in mind that I live in the barracks, so it's three guys in a 12x12 room.
Stumble This
I've had roommates disappear, I've had roommates I found out were dealing out of the house, another one that I found was GROWING in my fucking house. Yes, GROWING. They eat your food, they don't pay their bills, roommates blow. Well my roommate now blows...me...I live with my girlfriend and that's a totally new experience. Good and bad on so many different levels. Oh well, I hope you find a way to confront him about the issues and won't make things awkward in your place of residence. Good luck.
Late at night, whole barracks puts soaps in socks, holds him down in the bed and everyone pummels him.
Red Flag his ass.
Late at night, whole barracks puts soaps in socks, holds him down in the bed and everyone pummels him.
And then you'll find him in the middle of the night on the toilet talking to his gun...
Barracks are different than having roommates in a normal house/apartment, but I feel your pain. I grew up with 5 sisters and 3 brothers, and after that lived in a house with 3 roommates and 2 more who were "squatting." Not fun. I now live on my own for very obvious reasons.
I do agree with gwiz about the "half hour power showers" though - they are wonderful and I require them. I understand that this pisses roommates off (if hot water runs out quickly) and I'd cut it short if I knew someone was waiting. I don't whack off in the shower that often, by the way - it's just very relaxing and wakes me up for the day. I'm a horrible morning person.
Another thing that would piss my roommates off is how hard I am to wake up. My alarm clock would wake up others in the house before myself, but it's something I can't help.
I'm a very considerate person, though, and I CAN'T stand people who aren't. I suggest you teach him a lesson by feeding him his own medicine in some form or another.
Computer: Buy earplugs. It isn't perfect, but it works for all noise. You can turn off a computer, but you can't turn off snoring or random outdoor sounds. You can get a mask thing to cover your eyes as well if the light is really that bad.
He should be using headphones, but its a little more difficult to complain about the light. Is there somewhere else he can go? If he wants to be on his computer at 5am then that isn't an unreasonable action, but the sound is avoidable.
If you really want to make a point about the sound then find some music he hates and play it loud enough that he can't ignore it (earplugs for yourself are good here). Tell him that you will play the music any time he isn't using his headphones past midnight (or whatever time you choose).
It all came to a head when the swing lid of the rubbish bin had fallen inside it (right near the top mind you) and she'd emptied her uneaten food all over it. I had called her out on it when she came into the kitchen and she pushed me fairly hard back against the table. I obviously quite heavily up the duff took affront to this and grabbed her arm and twisted it while pushing her up against the wall, allegeldy spraining it.
Anyway, she fucked off a week later using this as an excuse. Like she hadn't asked for it! She left me with all the bills and no way to pay the rent on my own so I had to leave and go back to my parents. About a year later, I came back to the area to see a few friends i'd lost touch with. The nasty whore had spread rumours that i'd had my baby taken off me because i'd turned into a heroin addict. What the fuck!
quit pooping in the potty and not flushing.
learn to wipe your own asses.
quit falling over and getting booboos, making me kiss and bandaid them.
learn to cook for your damn selves.
please get tall enough to reach the sink and wash out your own dishes.
stop making me do all the damn laundry.
learn to mop.
quit leaving your toys in the back seat of my car.
nah... just kidding, i love that shit.
haha i have the most perfect roommates.
Well I see it as 2 against 1.
^ That fucking thing with the tape.... you realize you can rip the corneas right off someone's eyes that way? I had a major phobia growing up about some idiot coming up behind me and ripping my corneas off in an attempt to be funny.
You can't be serious...
^ That fucking thing with the tape.... you realize you can rip the corneas right off someone's eyes that way? I had a major phobia growing up about some idiot coming up behind me and ripping my corneas off in an attempt to be funny.
You must've been a hoot growing up. Did you also rubberband plastic shopping bags around your shoes when it was raining?
That is until I got married. That took a full two years to get used too... Every bloody time I went to get something, it had been moved, Stacked, put "away", piled up, found a new home, you get the idea.
I have a lousy memory so I have a place for everything so I don't have to try to remember - but if nothing is ever where I leave it - I start bloody go insane - I'm sure there were times I was certifiable when I went to get something and could NOT FIND IT! (which means someone "found a new home for it")
what am i saying?..that shit blew ballz!
it's been 25 years and i still remember my roomie spankin it.shook the whole damn bunk bed.all i got was denial when i confronted him.
ok ok..that one was easy to stop.i started taking pictures /evil grin.
Why are we always picking on the religious when we let the damn sports fanatics off easy? I fucking hate sports. Almost all of them. It's all based on our thirst for war, our nationalism, partisanship, us against them, kick their asses we're better that they are. The draft is a model for slaverey. Idiots. Why don't you do something with your life that gives you that sense of achievement, instead of watching a bunch of overpaid chemically infused "athletes" grab each others asses. I think it's a lot of repressed homosexuality myself.
I say we pay the soldiers what we pay the ball players. Who would scoff at getting paid 15k/year to play a damn game, or conversely 6 million to get your ass shot at? Sports are at best stupid and boring, at worst stimulation for our worst traits as a species.
Oh, sorry, this was your rant wasn't it.